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Monday, March 21, 2005

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 Billionaires auction Social Security on eBay

A special announcement from Max Affluence, billionaire.

America's Most Revered Institution on the Block Monday, March 21st until Monday, March 28th

Fellow billionaires! I have fantastic news. We're bringing our auction of Social Security to eBay!

Frustrated by President Bush's failure to convince the American public to disregard their best interests in support of Wall Street, we at Billionaires For Bush have taken matters into our own hands. We're bypassing the uncooperative House and Senate and will sell the federal program on eBay to the first privately-held brokerage firm that can meet our reserve.

Why spend millions lobbying for Social Security privatization when you can bid on the Government's most popular program from the privacy of your own mansion?

The corporate profits of a privatized Social Security can be had with the click of a mouse! Go here, then forward this invitation to bid on to only every good ol' boy in your extensive private network.

Should eBay stand up for the American People and pull our auction early, you can still follow the action here.

All serious bidders will enjoy increased access to Congress and special favors from the White House. Have no fear - we'll make sure that Social Security doesn't get in the wrong hands. As the auction makes clear:
Employees of the government, their families, and any American who actually needs Social Security (or will one day in the future) are not eligible to bid. But, don't worry!! Ordinary Americans will remain eligible to pay our brokerage houses to manage their private accounts.

Paving the way for the elite to secure private ownership of America's Public Trust, this auction continues B4B's campaign for unchecked corporate power. For updated information on all our campaigns, please visit www.BillionairesForBush.com.

This ambitious effort to sell off Social Security coincides with our upcoming April Fools' Ball on March 31 at Crobar in New York. We're so pleased with President Bush's scheme to fool the American public that we'll celebrate in style with the winner of the auction. That's right: The winner who meets and pays the reserve will get an all-expenses-paid (not that they'll need it!) trip to New York to party with the Billionaires. Who says we don't look out for our own kind?

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